I'm Older Now

As a young adult, I saw both of my parents bury their own parents.  If things work the way we think they should, we will all witness the death of the people who gave us life.  It's just the natural progression of time.  I never spent any time contemplating the event as it was something that would happen when I was "older."  Somehow, I thought that when I was "older" I would be ready and saying good-bye would not be so difficult.  After all, I had watched my own parents go through it and it didn't seem that bad.  I thought maybe it was easier because it was expected, and they were older.
We put my sweet mother on hospice care two days ago.  Yesterday, the doctor visited and said that she felt mom would be gone in a week or two.  I have cried every day the last week or so since it became obvious that mom was not going to get better. This is not easy.  I have a broken heart.  I will miss her.  There are those on the other side who are anxiously awaiting her arrival, I feel their presence when I'm with her.  Her own mother, and my sister Debra who died shortly after birth, have been frequent visitors.  When she is ready to go, she will be escorted well.
And I will be sad...and officially older.